Friday, November 6, 2009
Chapter 6- Question #2
One of the major factors to me that deem someone as unattractive is their actions. I observe the interactions that an individual has with other people as an indication of how he will treat me in the future. Also, the way they interact with their family is a huge one. You know the family knows who the person is and the individual is less likely to not be their true self around their family. Duck’s theory does make sense to me but I do not agree completely with his model. He is missing a few steps that lead to increased intimacy. There is a difference between having a friend that you talk to occasionally and a boyfriend that you see every day. You have to get over trust, closeness, values and belief obstacles before true intimacy occurs. I believe everyone has known someone whom they have dismissed in the initial stages to reconsider them later on. My current best friend actually dismissed me back in high school. I was a complete nerd and nomad between groups trying to fit in. Then after we graduated we reunited one day and have been inseparable since.
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You had many valid points in this blog. I feel that seeing the way someone interacts with others is a good indication of if I would be attracted to them. For example, if I saw someone loud and immature with their friends, that would make me untracked towards them. Also seeing how someone interacts with family is huge. Family is one of the most important things in life, so to see how they interact with family members may help decipher a relationship. Mostly because one can usually see the real person around family member, it’s who helped make them who they are today.
ReplyDeleteI would also like to say that I think your post is very valid. I agreed with a lot of the things you said. I think I also tend to watch how a person interacts with other friends and their family. However, I would like to know, how does this work if the person you are getting to know does not have any family around. Or even if they do not have any close friends around. What if you move somewhere new and are trying to meet new people, how are people going to use the cues and filters for you.
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